PATHWAYS TO HAPPINESS

Rahman III ruled over spain for almost 50 years. He was favourably regarded as an effective and powerful leader, but this was found in his personal writings “I have now reigned about 50 years in victory or peace, beloved by my subjects, dreaded by my enemies, and respected by my allies. Riches and honour, power and pleasure, have waited on my call, nor does any earthly blessing appear to have been lacking for my happiness. In this situation I have diligently numbered the days of pure genuine happiness which have fallen to my lot. They amount to fourteen.”

The lesson from this is that happiness doesn’t fall into our live we have to identify, cultivate and direct it. There is a school of thought addressing happiness as what you acquire from having and joy as what you experience from giving. Here are the pathways to happiness

AM I HAPPY?

Ask yourself “Am I happy?” and let your heart, soul and body search deep for the answer. Do you react with a deep breath? What memories trickle into your mind? Who comes to your mind? All these will form the basis for a genuine answer.

NECESSARY STEPS

If you conclude that your happiness level needs increase, then take the necessary steps. Put in mind that if years from now, you will look back and wish you had done something, gone somewhere or met someone, I suggest you prevent that regret right now. Know your temperament and discover yourself, this will better inform you on how best to stay happy.

BE HAPPY NOW

Don’t wait for an ideal or better life circumstances to be happy. Change your life today. Don’t gamble on the future, act now, without delay.

MAINTAIN YOUR HEALTH

It is far easier to maintain good health than to regain it. A Chinese philosopher, Hong Zicheng wisely observed “the ailments of old age are really those incurred in youthful times”. To keep your body healthy and mind happy, engage in regular exercise. A recent study revealed that it is never too late to begin an exercise routine and that doing so offers great benefits.

MAKE OTHERS HAPPY

Happiness is increased when the people around you are also happy. Visiting prisons, orphanages, hospitals etc help the mind form a thankful stream of thought and the happiness of these individuals you visit are highly contagious. A scenario involving a teacher and a student who came last in class; the teacher desired to make the student feel better on seeing him very upset so he said “someone has to come thirtieth in a class of thirty. This year, it happens to be you who has made the heroic sacrifice, so that none of your friends have to suffer the ignominy of being last in the class. You are so kind for doing this, so compassionate. You deserve a medal.” With the fact that both of them knew that was ridiculous the student grinned and didn’t take it as such an end-of the-world event anymore.

FORGIVE YOURSELF

Self condemnation and regrets are huge happiness killers. Let go of places from your past where you did not live up to the optimum. Remind yourself you are human, not super human; that everyone, yourself included gets to make mistakes and have a lapse in judgement.

SMILE MORE

Don’t take life too seriously; you only get to live once. Try this; smile to almost everyone you see and meet on a day and frown the next. You will discover that day 1 will feel a lot better. Smile is a universal language that is highly contagious.

STOP SELF PITY

I heard a talk by a music producer who was born blind; he plays the organ, has produced a lot of musicians and is a multimillionaire. The summary of his happiness and success was simple, he never gave in to self pity.

TOP REGRETS

Learn about happiness from the dying. Bronnie Ware worked in a hospice for years. Based on her experience she wrote the book Top Five Regrets of The Dying. Those regrets are:

·         I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself

·         I wish I hadn’t worked so hard

·         I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings

·         I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends

·         I wish I had let myself be happier